16. January 2017

6 Comments

Studies Show

 

Sharpen you pencils.

Sharpen your pencils.

 

We live by the numbers.  Or so it seems.

Apparently the number-crunchers do studies & collect statistics on every crazy, conceiveable thing you can imagine.

Those of us with multiple sclerosis aren’t exempt from the studies either.

 

Did you know…..

85% of people are diagnosed with relapsing-remitting MS at onset.

And of those…

50% with RRMS will transition to secondary-progressive MS within a decade of diagnosis.

 

Well here at My Odd Sock, we (I) have conducted our own (my own) extensive research study on how MS affects our lives.  Here are the results.

 

Studies show…..

 

Amazing.

Amazing.

 

 

will find the toilet lid down when you have to pee the most.

 

 

 

 

 

About right.

About right.

 

 

 

will find an open disabled parking space at the mall.

 

 

 

 

Did I?

Did I?

 

 

 

will re-read several pages of a book before realizing you read it the day before.

 

 

 

 

 

Woops %$&@!

Woops %$&@!

 

 

 

of clumsy MSers will drop the soap in the shower.

 

 

 

 

 

Hmmm.

Hmmm.

 

 

 

will leave the doctor’s office with more questions than when you went in.

 

 

 

 

 

Attention shoppers.

Attention shoppers.

 

 

 

will choose the grocery shopping cart with the squeaky wheel.

 

 

 

 

 

Gimme a hand here.

Gimme a hand here.

 

 

will need a push getting their wheelchair/scooter over the large bump of the “handicap-accessible” curb.

 

 

 

 

 

You flasher!

You flasher!

 

 

 

will be embarrassed by an unzipped zipper or unbuttoned button because you have no sensation.

 

 

 

 

No shit.

No shit.

 

 

 

MSers who reach their yearly insurance deductible before the end of February.

 

 

 

 

 

Please give.....again.

Please give…..again.

 

 

 

People who donate to a charity then tire of the charity’s relentless requests to donate more.

 

 

 

 

Give it the sniff test.

Give it the sniff test.

 

 

 

will wear the same clothes two days in a row because “I didn’t do anything to get them dirty!”

 

 

 

 

Hoarder please.

Hoarder please.

 

 

 

Rollator users who need to empty trash they’ve collected in the basket under the seat.

 

 

 

 

Who is this?

Who is this?

 

 

 

will forget whose number you just dialed.

 

 

 

 

 

It counts, right?

It counts, right?

 

 

 

MSers have leg spasms so often they count on a FitBit.

 

 

 

 

 

VERY accurate!

VERY accurate!

 

 

know they are wasting their time reading My Odd Sock.

 

woman-yawning-150x150

 

 

 

 

The studies don’t lie.  OK maybe mine does a tad.

Defy all stats and make this your best day ever!

 

sock

 

 

 

 

 

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9. January 2017

5 Comments

MS Emojis

 

 

I'm sure this will be classy.

I’m sure this will be classy.

 

Emojis are everywhere in emails and text messages.

You can find them all over Facebook, Twitter & Pinterest.

Emojis have become a familiar part of our communication today.  

Adding an emoji to your message gives it a little extra umph of feeling!

 

But when you have multiple sclerosis, the most commonly used emojis can take on a completely different meaning.

 

I’ll explain by showing you an emoji…then tell you what it means to someone with MS.

Here’s hoping you enjoy “My Odd Sock’s MS Emojis”…..

 

 

Emoji                                 Definition

 

Don't mind me.

Don’t mind me.

 

 

 

        MSer past 8pm.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Outta my way!

Outta my way!

 

 

 

        Gotta pee real bad.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Oh boy.

Oh boy.

 

 

 

 

Look at the size of that friggin needle.

 

 

 

 

 

No sweat.

No sweat.

 

 

 

 

       Just fell but I’m OK.

 

 

 

 

 

 

No doubt.

No doubt.

 

 

 

 

           Big Pharm.

 

 

 

 

 

 

My luck-luck-lucky day!

My luck-luck-lucky day!

 

 

 

     

Disabled parking space right up front!

 

 

 

 

 

So unsure.

So unsure.

 

 

 

Not sure what treatment is best.

 

 

 

 

 

 

SUCCESS!

SUCCESS!

 

 

 

         I finally pooped!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Yuuuuck.

Yuuuuck.

 

 

 

    Solumedrol after-taste.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Geez.

Geez.

 

 

 

 

     Not another MRI.

 

 

 

 

 

Open-adam.

Open-adam.

 

 

 

Taking vitamins the size of horse pills.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Rotten SOB.

Rotten SOB.

 

 

 

The doctor you didn’t like.

 

 

 

 

 

 

You've GOT to be kidding?

You’ve GOT to be kidding?

 

 

 

That drug is how much?

 

 

 

 

 

 

Said with a smile.

Said with a smile.

 

 

 

 

F-U MS!

 

 

 

 

 

 

Doin my best!

Doin my best!    

 

 

 

 

MSer eating soup.

 

 

 

 

 

That boy needs incarcerated.

That boy needs incarcerated.

 

 

 

 

Just read My Odd Sock.

 

 

 

 

 

 

And finally…..

 

Keep moving!

Keep moving!

 

 

 

I have MS but I’m gonna be alright.

 

 

 

 

 

Cheers to you.  Make it a good one.  🙂

 

sock

 

 

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2. January 2017

4 Comments

Party Pooper

 

 

Without the smell.

Without the smell.

 

 

I’m always sorta glad when the holidays are over.

The social atmoshere of family gatherings, Christmas parties & New Year festivities make me stick out like Santa Claus during Hanukkah.

 

Mind you, I was never a life of the party.

But I was certainly a more active participant in years past.

 

 

 

The decline in my socialbility?

No doubt, I place the blame directly, point-blank, wholeheartedly on Multiple Sclerosis.

 

Notice I'm only halfway finished.

Notice I’m only halfway finished.

 

 

The reasons are so numerous they could fill a novel by Leon Uris.

 

Included in no particular order are:

 

  • Time of day
  • Accessibility
  • Crowds
  • Bathroom location
  • Loud music/party chatter
  • Energy level
  • Close quarters
  • Unfamiliar locations
  • New people
  • Standing/sitting too long
  • Logistics of food & drinks
  • Nerves
  • Being off-schedule
  • Yada yada
  • Etc
  • Everything  

 

Whereas I was once witty & charming to talk with (the other person being well-intoxicated), the loud noise of a party drain my thoughts to the point where I can only grunt like the Geico caveman (and just as hairy).

I don’t have the energy to speak loudly enough over the commotion to make myself heard.

 

Another problem is that I take up a helluva lot of space.

Whether using my two canes or the wheelchair, I find myself being the giant ottoman in a cramped living room.

 

Straight-back no less!

Straight-back no less!

 

 

For these reasons, I usually find myself in an out-of-the-way corner.

I’m good at smiling and mouthing “hi” to people who venture into my quadrant of the room.

 

 

 

Someone call 911.

Someone call 911.

 

 

Well, I see my thoughts on this topic have the Funny Meter smoking like a Samsung, so I’ll end my bickering.

 

How’s your MS social life?

Do you experience similar feelings and/or thoughts?

 

Here’s to a more social 2017.

sock

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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27. December 2016

1 Comment

MS-A-Day Calendar

You may have received a page-a-day desk calendar as a Christmas gift.  But did you get one like this?

Enjoy this re-run of My Odd Sock’s “MS-A-Day Calendar”…..

 

 

Dogs.  Cats.  Jokes.  Trivia.  Recipes.  Sports.

They make those page-a-day calendars for almost everything.

Almost.

They forgot chronic disease.

 

A product you don't need.

A product you don’t need.

 

 

 

That’s why we at My Odd Sock have jumped (not very high, mind you) to corner the market and create the first page-a-day calendar devoted entirely to multiple sclerosis!

 

(Like you need a daily reminder you have MS.)

 

 

Here is just a sampling of what you will enjoy with your “2016 MS-A-Day Calendar”…..

 

 

Remember what?

Remember what?

 

 

 

 

 

A special day indeed.

Bigger than tax day!

Bigger than tax day!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Make it a contrast!

Make it a contrast!

 

 

 

Watch your step, Gimpy!

Watch your step, Gimpy!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Whaddya know, I learned something from reading this rag!

Whaddya know, I learned something from reading this rag!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Be a sport.

Be a sport.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Stop bitching.

Stop bitching.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

As you can see, My Odd Sock’s “2016 MS-A-Day Calendar” isn’t worth the paper it is printed on!

 

But this calendar is 100% recyclable.  And at just $29.99 each, proceeds benefit a worthy cause—my wallet!

 

Order now and I’ll send you a second MS calendar absolutely free.  (I’ll also call the police because who the heck needs two of these?)

 

The “2016 MS-A-Day Calendar”—a unique way to celebrate being one with MS.

Get yours today!

 

sock

P.S.-  This is not an actual product, but a complete waste of your time & my creative energy.

Keep moving & make it a great day.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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20. December 2016

7 Comments

Driving For Christmas

 

It truly IS a special time of year.

The nip in the air.  The bustle of busy people.

And the excitement of a certain day to come.

 

Special indeed.

Special indeed.

Yes, Hyundai Holidays are here.

Cars shined bright.

Salesmen in sweaters way too tight.

 

 

 

 

So festive!

So festive!

The wreaths, ribbons & lights so fond…

can only mean Toyotathon Is On!

 

 

 

But it’s Christmas I say, who can afford new car fuss?

 

 

That's how!

That’s how!

 

 

Sure you can!

During Kia Holidays On Us.

 

 

 

 

Christmas in luxury.

Christmas in luxury.

Oh I don’t know… think I’ve overspent.

Never says Cadillac.

It’s Season’s Best Event.

 

 

Like it!

Like it!

 

Well, guess I could be a rich pretender.

‘Cause Lexus hails it a December To Remember.

 

 

 

 

 

More my speed!

More my speed!

 

Honest though, through all the holiday craze…

..I wish you & yours a Happy Honda Days.

 

 

 

 

sock

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12. December 2016

6 Comments

Raising Canes

 

A true story.

A true story.

 

Although being “blessed” with multiple sclerosis for over 20 years now, it has only been the last eight or so that I have been leaning on a cane.  

Or ‘canes’ as I now use two.

In the beginning there was the typical public embarrassment.

Getting use to the stares as a seemingly fit man needed canes to walk!

When in reality the “embarrassing shame” I felt was mostly a product of my own thinking.  Others weren’t staring–it was my own imagination.

A better way to look at it was who cares what others think.  If it helps you get out & about–use it!

 

I was discussing the ins & outs of cane ownership with a friend who recently began using one.

In fact, she said she needed to get a second cane to put in her downstairs family room.  That way she always would have one handy.

Smart lady.  (Must be why she hangs with me!)

I told my friend I have canes everywhere in my home…..

 

How convenient!

How convenient!

 

 

 

I have basement canes right at the bottom of the stairs.

Easier to use than trying to “wall-walk” when there are no walls!

 

 

 

 

 

Forced to occupy the garage!

Forced to occupy the garage!

 

 

 

 

I have garage canes just outside the back door.

 

These are the canes I use outdoors.

 

 

 

Merry Ho Ho.

Merry Ho Ho.

 

 

 

And this being the Christmas season, I even have candy canes!

 

(Hey, sure, it is lame-o humor but it’s free to you so shut up!)

 

 

 

 

 

I went on to explain to my friend that a cane can be used for more than just mobility…..

 

 

Lights off to save energy (MY energy!)

Lights off to save energy (MY energy!)

 

 

A cane is great for saving a step or two when turning off a light switch.

 

Be careful not to leave marks on the wall.

(Been there done that. Or so my wife tells me.)

 

 

 

 

C'mere you dang things.

C’mere you dang things.

 

 

 

I use my canes as reachers to hook shoes, a book or the remote.

*Do NOT use to reach for drinks, sandwiches or pizza.

 

 

 

 

Like a bird leg.

Like a bird leg.

 

 

 

 

At the end of the day, canes help me stretch my weary legs while watching the boob-tube.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Dude needs a shave!

Dude needs a shave!

 

 

And of course a cane’s handle does a dandy job working out muscle kinks in your back & shoulders.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Despite my frequent frustrations of needing canes to stand & shuffle (walk) as I do, I have become comfortable in their presence and even get nervous when they aren’t in arm’s reach.

They’re my canes.  And now they are a part of my life.

 

How do your mobility aids (if any) enhance your daily living?

Would love to hear your story!

Keep moving my friend.

sock

 

 

 

 

 

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