23. May 2017

6 Comments

Your Own Doc

 

 

Is this E.R.?

 

Looking ahead at the calendar reminds me I am three months away from my next appointment with the MS doctor.

She sees me every six months with each visit lasting between 45 minutes to an hour in length.

The twice-a-year visits seem to be the standard among those of us with multiple sclerosis.

 

 

 

So for roughly two hours a year, you are face-to-face with a medical professional.

But I ask…..What do you do with the remainder of your time?

That is when YOU…must become your OWN doctor.

 

You:   Hi doc.

You:   Terri, how are you doing?  Any problems with the MS?

You:   Well, doc, my balance has been off.  And I’m really stiff.

You:   Have you been keeping active?

You:   Not so much.

You:   Uh hm.  How’s your energy?

You:   Kind of draggy.  I’ve been eating lots of junk lately, so maybe…

You:   Uh hm.  And how are you doing with your meds?

You:   Well, I kinda forget once in a while.

You:   Uh hm.

 

My point is, YOU are in charge of your health.

You must take control of every minute of every day.  You must be your own doctor between appointments.

 

Can you follow this?

 

 

MS is relentless.  MS doesn’t take a day off, not even an hour.

So you must be persistent in your fight against it.

We can all do better.  We can all make better choices.

I’m not saying to make huge sacrifices–just smarter ones.

As your own doctor, you know when you should move more.

Or when you should slow down.

You know when you should avoid the heat.

Or go to the bathroom before it is too late.

You know what you should eat.  And what to avoid.

You know what to think.  Those dark thoughts only drag you lower.

 

My head is more pointed.

 

Empower yourself.

Hold that noggin up.

Throw your shoulders back.

Be wise.  Be open to change.

Your body will tell you what it wants.  What it needs.

YOU are as smart as any doctor when it comes to knowing YOU.  (And you didn’t have to spend $100G’s on a medical degree.)

 

 

So what are you gonna do till your next appointment?

I have three months to give MS hell.

I hope you plan to do the same.

 

 

 

 

 

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19. May 2017

3 Comments

Hit The Shower

 

Time to come clean.

 

There’s nothing new about taking a shower.

Most of us go through this routine process nearly every day.

Yet lately I have felt strange in the shower.

A closed-in feeling of claustrophobia.

Between walls of fiberglass & a nylon curtain, I found my space was shrinking.  And I was determined to discover why.

 

 

So I took inventory.  And here are my findings.

 

In my shower, there are…..

 

 

Five bath towels.

(I wonder as there are only three of us currently living at home.)

 

Mating ritual?

 

Two bars of soap.

 

(I don’t even want to know what these soaps are up to.)

 

 

 

Two wash cloths.

(Alright who is doubling up?)

 

 

Two razors.

 

Must be important–has its own string.

 

 

 

One of these.

 

(Not sure of its name or purpose)

 

 

 

 

This with a handle.

 

 

 

 

 

One of those.  On a stick.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Again, not sure of the purpose, but I DO know it works great cleaning the bugs off the car bumper……

Scrub-A-Dub-Dub

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

And NINETEEN bottles of products.

Including shampoos, conditioners, cleansers, lotions, body wash, volumizers & rinses.

 

I need an interpreter!

 

 

Many of these items, you need to be a linguist just to pronounce the names.

 

Ferterer?  Fructis?  Bain Volumifique?

Is this a shower or a lesson from Rosetta Stone?

 

I don’t know about you, but when it comes to my shower, I get an MRI just to stretch out!

 

A shower is the place to unwind & relax?

I don’t think so.  Then again, I’m all wet.

 

 

 

 

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12. May 2017

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MS Class of 1996

 

MS Class of 1996

 

Throughout the land people young & old are donning caps & gowns in celebration of their hard work & achievements.

It’s graduation season, where hungry minds look ahead, plying their knowledge to challenges & future opportunity.

 

It has me thinking back to my own days as a young grad.

 

The year was 1996.

I was 33 years old when I confidently strode across the stage to receive my diagnosis—multiple sclerosis.

Made my family proud, I did.

One happy MS grad

 

 

Aw, here I am on my special day.

All dapper & handsome.

 

You couldn’t even tell I had MS back then.

 

Smiling, but nervous.

Who knew what the future would hold?

 

 

 

That’s me on the right!

 

Here’s the MS Class of 1996 photo.

We were a spirited bunch back then.

Our class motto was “96 take Your Pix!”

 

I still remember some of my classmates…..

 

 

Tom

 

There was my buddy, Tom.

He & I would challenge each other to the nine-hole peg test.

Tom was fast.  And he never dropped a peg.  I accused him of cheating by using stick’em on his fingers!

 

 

 

 

Peggy

 

 

Peggy was in my class.

She was voted “Cutest Foot Drop.”

She was also busy with the “Infusion Club.”

(That explains why she always had bandages on her arm!)

 

 

 

Livia

 

Livia was a “96er.”

She was cool.

But because Livia was dx’d as chronic-progressive—she kinda thought she was better than the rest of us relapsing-remitters.

 

 

 

 

 

Chet

 

Chet was another buddy of mine in the MS Class of 1996.

 

He was a real over-achiever…President of Scooter Society.

Active in Spasticity Club.

And winner of the “Bowel & Bladder Bowl.”

 

 

 

Sarah

 

 

Sarah also got MS in 1996.

I always had a crush on her.

In fact, I asked Sarah to the big MS dance our Senior Year.

 

Here’s a picture of my “Prom-Posal”…..

 

She said “no.”

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Lisa

 

Here’s Lisa, the class clown.

 

No one could wall-walk like her!

 

All goofing around aside, Lisa was a big part of the Rollator Precision Drill Team.

 

Sweet moves!

 

 

 

I hear these days, she’s a well-known MRI Interior Designer.

 

 

 

Tom is bored.

 

Oh that’s Tom again reminding me this bit has gone on too long.

 

Yep, we are members of the “MS Class of 1996.”

To all 2017 grads, we say “Don’t worry.  Keep smiling.  And Keep moving.”

 

 

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5. May 2017

3 Comments

My Odd Sock’s Dumb Stuff

 

Isn’t it all dumb stuff?

 

 

Welcome to My Odd Sock’s “Dumb Stuff” where we feature absurd products that make little sense.

 

Today, we thumb our way through Parade Magazine.

 

As you may know, Parade is the weekly insert found in the Sunday paper.  It features celebrity news, tidbits, recipes along with ads for products that leave you scratching your head.

 

 

Ever see the “collectible & commemorative” Super Bowl thimble set?  (True product!) 

Ooo, be the talk of the quilting bee…

Eleanor-  “Myrna is all uppiddy using her thimble from Super Bowl 9!”

Helen-  “At least she’s not bragging about her smartphone from Jitterbug.”

Eleanor-  “Uh hmm.”

 

…Which leads me to the subject of this post.

Introducing…..the Easy Climber Elevator!

 

Holy crap!

 

How about finding room in your home for this convenient & attractive device!

The` ad says it is slightly larger than a washing machine…more like a damn phone booth from Ma Bell.

 

It’s like Superman’s changing room in your foyer!

Didn’t Ric Flair battle Undertaker in the Easy Climber during Wrestlemania IV?

If the grandkids get out of line–you can put’em away for time-out in your own holding cell.

 

Sweet addition–if you’re a Radisson!

 

 

The ad says:

“Can be placed virtually anywhere in your home.”

 

Yeah anywhere big enough to fit an elevator!

 

I could understand the need if the Easy Climber was big enough for a scooter, but it doesn’t even appear large enough for my wheelchair.

 

 

 

The no-so fine print.

Says the Easy Climber is “Ideal for ranch houses with basements.”

Wait, isn’t that the purpose of living in a ranch?…NO STAIRS?

I love how the ad reads “Motorized stair lifts…are hardly an enhancement to your home’s decor.”

But a game-show’s sound-proof booth IS?

The Easy Climber looks like one of those things you get inside & money blows all over the place.

 

If you want to learn more about the Easy Climber Elevator, call’em at 1-888-927-5273.

I pass, Easy Climber.  I’m sticking with my thimble set.

 

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1. May 2017

4 Comments

MS Horoscope

 

The future holds ANOTHER far-fetched My Odd Sock.

 

 

Everyone knows a horoscope is used to forecast futures and a person’s character based on the position of stars & planets at the time of their birth.

Yeah, whether or not that is true is a toss-up.

Some believe.  Others don’t.

But mostly horoscopes are enjoyed for entertainment with a dash of hope thrown in for flavor.

 

 

While there are PLENTY of horoscopes to read—not a one describes a sign’s MS characteristics.

That’s where My Odd Sock steps in with a real time-waster….your MS Horoscope!

 

I’ll give you the Zodiac sign, some common traits of that sign…followed by what that means if you have multiple sclerosis.

Let’s look skyward…..

 

Whatever that is.

 

Aquarius   Jan 21-Feb 19

 

You are honest & loyal.  Original & inventive.  An adventurous spirit that inspires freedom.  A forward thinker.

MS Horoscope

You figure out a way to do something to save the energy.  You cram the most you can into a Sharps container.  Sits in a chair while preparing meals and uses a cane/crutch to reach the remote, book or shoes.

 

 

Something smells fishy.

 

Pisces    Feb 20-March 20

 

You are sensitive, compassionate & kind.  Selfless & sympathetic  You try to make the world a better place.

MS Horoscope

You will not let MS win.  You remember names and are the one others call during a relapse.  And you let others use the bathroom first.

 

 

 

Impervious to headahes, I hope!

 

Aries    March 21-April 20

 

You have uncommon courage and dare to go places others would never venture.  You are adventurous & an enthusiastic daredevil.

 

MS Horoscope

You charge into the handicap stall without first checking to see if there is toilet paper.  Will take a shot in the OTHER arm.  You thumb your nose at the co-pay and always drive the fastest scooter at the grocery.

 

 

Nice nosering!

 

Taurus     April 21-May 21

 

You are persistent & determined.  Brave, patient & reliable.  Inflexible, if not predictable.

 

MS Horoscope

You take your meds like clockwork.  You lay out the towel BEFORE a shower.  Must finish 1st at the MS Walk.  And you leave the disabled plakard hanging from the mirror at all times, just in case.

 

 

What are YOU looking at?

 

Gemini    May 22-June 21

 

You are adaptable & versatile.  A supreme seeker of knowledge with incredible communication skills.  Inquisitive.

 

MS Horoscope

 

You memorize the entire disclaimer of a prescription med.  You take over at a doctors appointment.  You know the latest quirky, trendy MS treatment.  You have a Smartphone and aren’t afraid to use it.

 

 

Pinch me awake, please!

 

Cancer   June 22-July 22

 

You are unflinching in the face of adversity.  You ride waves of change because there is no such thing as a problem that can’t be solved.

 

MS Horoscope

 

You are not bothered when disabled parking is full.  You use a rollator for more than just walking.  Can split a pill with a butter knife.  And put your feet up when fatigued.

 

 

A lion with great hair.

 

Leo   July 23-Aug 21

 

You are generous & warm-hearted  Creative & enthusiastic.  A true humanitarian whose job is to protect & serve.  Bossy & intolerant.

 

MS Horoscope

 

Others can still read your handwriting.  You give advice to the newly diagnosed.  Raise money for the MS Society w/ intimidation.  Would give someone in need the cooling vest off your back.

 

 

Doesn’t look happy.

 

Virgo   Aug 22-Sept 23

 

You are strong & fiercely independent.  A meticulous perfectionist.  You are reliable & practical, but you worry too much.

 

MS Horoscope

 

You refuse help getting up after a fall.  You get nervous if a prescription refill is slow to arrive in the mail.  Takes pills/vitamins in order of size–biggest to smallest.  Created My Odd Sock & still thinks it sucks (Me).

 

 

Looks quite balanced.

 

Libra    Sept 24-Oct 23

 

You are fun, charming, sensitive & artistic.  Indecisive.  Intelligent.  Sees both sides of a situation—which is why you can’t make up your mind.

 

MS Horoscope

 

You think an MRI would make a cozy place to cuddle.  Can’t decide between Rebif & Gilenya.  Signs in at the doctor’s office using a calligraphy pen.  And lets others sit closest to the bathroom.

 

 

Creepy-crawly.

 

Scorpio   Oct 24-Nov 22

 

You are determined.  Forceful, powerful & passionate.  A timeless truth seeker with an uncanny ability to see behind the veil.

 

MS Horoscope

 

You dive head-first into every MRI.  You read each research study & are the 1st to try a new treatment.  Believes M&Ms are better than Skittles, hands down.

 

 

Shoot me to get me out of this post!

 

Sagittarius  Nov 23-Dec 22

 

You are blindly optimistic with an endless enthusiasm for life.  Restless, won’t sit still.  And you crave big adventure.

 

MS Horoscope

 

You have more than one mobility device in the trunk of your car.  You believe the surfers in the advertisement really does have MS.  Leads the support group and wants to go to Mexico for authentic salsa & stem cells.

 

 

The last one!

 

Capricorn   Dec 23-Jan 20

 

You are an old soul.  Practical, patient & careful.  Wise & honorable, you do not gamble, but plan, rehearse & execute.

 

MS Horoscope

 

You prefer bar over liquid soap.  You are still using an ABC drug.  Can put on an AFO with your eyes closed.  And you are prompt to rotate the tires on a scooter every 5,000 miles.

 

 

So this ends my time as a fortune teller—thank goodness too, this headwrap is messin my hair something bad!

Look to the stars & keep moving.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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25. April 2017

13 Comments

Know Your Abrasion

Because I have run out of time, let’s roll with a My Odd Sock from the archives.  I hope you enjoy…and can relate (safely)! 

 

 

test your knowledge

Let’s play an MSer’s favorite game of cuts, scrapes and bruises.  It’s time for….

“Know

Your

Abrasion”

 

 

 

bruiseHmm, a bruise on your arm.

Did you…

A)  Catch your arm on a closet door.

B) Run into the fence post.

C) I have MS, I don’t remember.

 

 

 

IMG_0321Ouch, that scrape on your knuckles seems painful.

Did you…

A) Reach into the tool box.

B) Touch the sharp edge under the sink.

C) I have MS, I’m not sure.

 

 

 

scratchWhat did you do to your leg?

Did you…

A) Scrape it on the concrete steps.

B) Scratch it on the edge of the deck.

C) I have MS, what scratch?

 

 

 

My point is, living with multiple sclerosis, I (and you) tend to acquire many unexplained nicks, marks, cuts, bumps & bangs.

Often we can’t explain how we got them!

Having no feeling from the armpits down, My Odd Sock seems to collect skin abrasions like a Salvation Army kettle collects pocket change!

I find marks on my body and have no idea where they came from.  Family & friends find that truly amazing.  Heck, I don’t even feel the blood running down my leg!

Sometimes I’ll be doing something and realize “that may leave a mark.”  And you betcha, later, I’ll be drying off after a shower and find blood on my towel.

Are we superhuman?

Do we have high pain tolerance?

Nah, we just have MS!

Are you one with multiple sclerosis who finds unexplained “ouchies?”

Tell me your side—and don’t get any blood on the keyboard!

 

 

scrapesWhat happened to your arm?

Did you…

A) Scrape it trimming the roses.

B) Fall in the laundry room.

C) I have MS…it matches my knee.

 

 

 

IMG_0325Black & blue seems to be your color.

Did you…

A) Bump into the car door.

B) Hit the corner of the cabinet.

C) I have MS, sh#t happens.

 

 

Answer Guide:   “C” is the correct response to all five questions!

Congratulations, either you have MS or know someone who does!  Thank you for playing.  Be safe.  And we’ll see you next time on “Know Your Abrasion!”

sock

 

 

 

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