14. April 2015


How Are You?

We'll open with a greeting.

We’ll open with a greeting.


How are you?” is an honest enough question.

But if you have cancer, MS, the bubonic plague or anything in between…you tend to hear that question more than usual.

Ad nauseum, in fact.

It’s a toss-up to what I hear more often…”How are you?…or the two guys eating at Sonic.  (I get it—they like Sonic!)


Sometimes people put a mushy-sweet spin on the “you.”

“How are yooouu?  Like they are talking to a poor, pitiful darling.

I’m a dude with multiple sclerosis–not a pooch in a pet shop!


But this rant isn’t about the question—it’s about your answer.



Be nice, now.

Be nice, now.


How do you respond when asked “How are you?”

Are you honest?  Sarcastic?  Dramatic?  Snarky?  Deflective?  Truthful?  Sympathetic?

Most times I give a quick “I’m fine” while throwing the ball back in their court with a simple “How ’bout you?” followed by a question about their kids/spouse/job/pet/car or anything I can think of so I don’t have to answer their question “How are you?”




What does this mean?

What does this mean?




Your response may be different depending on who is asking…a family member or close friend probably gets a more honest answer.

While a casual acquaintance receives the polite brush-off.





Sock has wood.

Sock has wood.



You may want to look at it this way…does this person really want to hear about your fatigue, spasticity, memory issues, bladder accidents, vision or pain?


Naw, it’s not worth it. so give’em the nicey-nice brush off response.






Yes you are.  Yes you are.

Yes you are. Yes you are.


Some folks like to say…”I’m living the dream.”


Honestly, this snippy answer annoys me.  I hear this from people who are working, walking & functioning normally.  I’m annoyed because this turd has no idea how his or her world could be much much worse.


I suggest they better squeeze the life out of every moment, because tomorrow could paint a way different picture!



That's all we can do!

That’s all we can do!


Personally, I prefer to take the middle road and respond with an answer that is all of the above.

Not too snarky.

Not too revealing.

Yet, it addresses my MS & my daily struggles.  Along with a hint of perseverance, fight and pride.

I’m doin’ my best.

And so should you.









Continue reading...

11. April 2015


Two Quick Bits



Cheesy graphic to open.

Cheesy graphic to open.



Through the years, My Odd Sock has proven you don’t have to look far to find something funny.

(Usually skipping My Odd Sock and visiting another humor site will suffice!)


Here are a couple of things I stumbled upon (I have MS–shit happens) in recent days…..




Toofer Tuesday?

Toofer Tuesday?

First, is this advertisement for a dental clinic.


The image of those giant, yellowish dentures really jump out to bite you.  (Sorry, I had to pun.)


They look like the candy wax teeth we would chew as kids.


These dentures would be perfect if you were the Joker in a Batman movie!


I want to wind them up so they chatter across the table!


And I like the $50 off coupon.

Competent, qualified dentists are known for accepting coupons.  (Wonder if they “double” the value on Tuesdays?)



Next, I found this item in the local newspaper…..



Writing fun!

Writing fun!



Yeah, this will be a fun event!


You can learn to write your own obituary.

So, I guess you must be near death to attend?


“Reservations are required”, so if your time is up—don’t delay, call now!


Would it be too much to attend dressed as the Grim Reaper and greet people as the come & go?


I assume morticians will also be on hand to make final arrangements!


And a free lunch will be served.  (I hope it is a light lunch as I would hate to die on a full tummy!)




That’s all I have.  Keep your eyes peeled as there is funny stuff all around…stuff guaranteed to make you smile!

Thanks for reading and (hopefully) laughing with My Odd Sock.


Continue reading...

8. April 2015


Crowds, Chaos & Confusion

Let’s revisit this old My Odd Sock.  I am currently “prepping” for my first colonoscopy, so no time to create a new post.

Please enjoy as I gotta go.  Literally, I gotta go…. 





Yep, crowds, chaos & confusion.  Nothing brings this Odd Sock to his knees faster than a situation involving any of these components.  (A kick to the nether-regions does too, but that’s a different story!)


As my MS has progressed, so has my ability to cope with these attention-diverting, energy-zapping triplets of trouble.

I get spooked by hustle & bustle, loud noises and frantic movement.


What gives with that?


Of course I blame it all on multiple sclerosis.  MS seems to be my “catch-all” of finger pointing!  (I outta know, being the youngest in my family, I got blamed for everything–so now I blame MS.)




If I am walking, it’s the fear of falling that fuels my anxiety.  What if someone trips on my cane?  What if my toe catches on something?  What if I get bumped and loose my balance?

I take pratfalls like a silent-movie comedian.  I’ve taken a tumble in a crowd before–and I sure as hell don’t want it to happen again.  So when walking I must concentrate very hard…and any ANY disruption can be a disaster!


Why not use a rollator or a wheelchair I hear you shout.

Well, let me tell you–my anxiety level still rises even with my backside firmly planted in a wheelchair!  People cut in & out in front of you.  I must stare intently at their feet–careful not to clip their heels with my foot rests.

In a crowd, a wheelchair rider sees nothing but asses to the front…and crotches to either side.  “Tramp Stamps” fill your sight lines while the after- effects of someone’s lunch fills your sense of smell.



Crowded roomSeveral years ago, I freaked out during a buffet luncheon on my first day on a cruise ship.  It was all three…crowds…chaos…and confusion.

People swarmed & darted like ravenous jackals.  I couldn’t move anywhere in my wheelchair without stopping, tripping or impeding someone’s feeding frenzy.


Gluttony Gone Wild!


I had lost my family in the rush and couldn’t get near enough to the food to make a selection.  Several staff members asked to help but I was so shocked I couldn’t answer.  Thankfully, my wife found me—realized I was near meltdown–and helped me to a better place.



The Funny Meter


Oh, thanks Funny Meter.

I’m telling the story of when I wanted to shove a butter knife into my thigh–and you want me to be funny?

Real class Funny Meter!



So I ask you…Is it MS?

Is MS the maestro who conducts my orchestra of anxiety?

Am I the only one who fears the triple threat of crowds, chaos & confusion?


I share my thoughts & experiences for your entertainment, surely.  But also to help you realize you are not alone.  As MSers, we face many unique challenges and maybe, just maybe…we can get through them together.  (Geez, that sounds like a movie premise on Lifetime!)

Here are to calmer days ahead.



Continue reading...

4. April 2015


Inspirational Calendar


I’m a sucker for inspiration.

A devotee of motivation.

A disciple of anything that puts a skip in my step and fire in my belly.  (Was that “inspiration” or did I just eat a spicy taco?)


Anywho, my point is, I love articles, bits & chutneys that give me a good feeling to get up & get going.


Little package.  Big inspiration.

Little package. Big inspiration.


That’s why I love the little day-by-day calendar that sits atop our microwave.


This cherished gem gives me a daily boost of quiet spirit.


It includes quotes from famed leaders & philosophers, historical figures, celebrities, achievers and Bibles verses as well.


It is simply a bright way to begin each day!


Just this week, one such quote forced me to scratch my ginormous melon head…..


Feeling inspired yet?

Feeling inspired yet?


“What we love we shall grow to resemble.”


I don’t know about you, but I think of everyone out there who is now looking at their spouse/partner/mate—and going…”Ewwwwwwww!”


Can’t imagine my wife with a receding hairline, big schnooze, big ears, gross feet and hair on her back.  (Yes, I’m a real catch!)

And that’s on a good day!



Then you may notice who came up with this…..St. Bernard.

Of course, St. Bernard would say something like this—who would want to look like him?

Really, who was St. Bernard anyway?  Never heard of such a person.


In fact, it took many hours of research to finally uncover a picture of him…..


Wipe the drowl, please.

Wipe the drowl, please.



Yep, I’ll be.

St. Bernard existed.  (Bloodshot eyes and all)


Let’s just hope you don’t grow to resemble him.


Be inspired!








Continue reading...

31. March 2015


I Told You, Remember?


Fancy title page.

Fancy title page.

“I told you, remember?”

I don’t know about you, but I get that alot.


During conversations with loved ones, I’ll ask a question and hear “I told you, remember?” as their response.

Sometimes it clicks and I’ll say…”Oh yeah.”

Other times it fizzles & peters out like a damp firecracker.




Being honest, really.

Being honest, really.


Is this the dreaded MS-related “cog-fog?”  A memory lapse?  A neurological short-circuit synapsis?


Call it what you want—it’s a pain in my rear end.


And what bothers me most is that it is happening with more & more frequency.




Quit it brain!

Quit it brain!

My wife says I should get my hearing checked, but I disagree that’s the problem.


For over 20 years, I produced lame commercials at a radio station.  So I am trained to hear clips & pops so faint a Beagle would tilt its head.


At church I can hear a fart from six pews back…but don’t ask me to remember what I just heard!




Not good with a knife & fork

Not good with a knife & fork


Some folks respond by talking to me louder…and slower.


Yeah that helps.


What am I in kindergarten?


Is it my day to be line-leader, I forgot?



I flunked penmanship.

I flunked penmanship.


Thus, my predicament must be MS-related I assume.

The Swiss-cheese myelin of my brain makes collecting a thought as porous as eating soup from a strainer.

Like wearing fish-net stockings is really chilly.  (Again, I assume.  I have no experience wearing stockings.  At least none I’ll admit publically.)





So how do we deal with this?

Grin & bear it?  Focus & listen harder?  Shrug our shoulders and shake our heads side-to-side?

I remind you with…”I told you, remember?”

And you’ll say…”Oh yeah.”


Continue reading...

25. March 2015


MS Playtime



College-educated, but you wouldn't know it.

College-educated, but you wouldn’t know it.


We’re all mostly serious & junk about our “platonic” relationships with multiple sclerosis.


That’s why My Odd Sock has decided to call recess for a little MS Playtime!

But we can’t play without toys, right?  So I gathered up a few bits to use in poking fun at our dreaded ick.


Let’s play kids!….


Man-eating beast.

Man-eating beast.
















Winner winner chicken dinner.

Winner winner chicken dinner.
















Stick it to me.

Stick it to me.
















My ship done sailed!

My ship done sailed!
















I have a sudden urge for bananas.

I have a sudden urge for bananas.
















Part 1 of 2.

Part 1 of 2.





Getting real fancy with a two-parter!

(See below)




Part 2 of 2.

Part 2 of 2.





Wow, now wasn’t that worth the wait?






I prefer mine mashed w/butter.

I prefer mine mashed w/butter.
















How 'bout a "contrast?"

How ’bout a “contrast?”
















And finally…


My parents are not proud.

My parents are not proud.
















That does it for MS Playtime.  I hope you enjoyed our little break from reality!






Continue reading...
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