My Odd Sock

What? More? Really?

SMH, short for “shaking my head.”

There are a lot of things going on in this world today that leaves one SMH.

Heck this whole website is based on SMH.

So to add fuel to the fire, I thought I would “pile on” with a few new items worthy of SMH distinction.

Let’s check’em out for a collective shaking of our heads…..

All the news fit to print.

In this newsy tidbit, a school district finds it neccessary to announce it now has a Facebook page.

Big news if this were..say..2005!

What took you so long?  Even my 99 year-old great Nan is on Facebook!

What wasn’t My Space getting the response you wanted anymore?

That kind of progressive thinking will have them on Instagram by decade’s end.

What’s next?…..

The sweet taste of patriotism!

Okay okay, I am proud to be an American, but this patriotic, flag-waving gets carried away at times.

Even this bottle of honey is labeled “Made by American bees.”

Just how can you be sure this honey has been made by American b….

Quite a trademark!

Oops, I guess that proves it!

Finally, here’s a product that comes from the headquarters of smh goods…Bed Bath & Beyond.

Oh geez.

It’s the “Illumibowl”, the motion-activated toilet night light.

Really?  I need this?

Toilets in Flint glow like this & they don’t have the light!

The ROY G BIV of toilet lights.

Best of all, Illumibowl projects in eight colors!

“Set your favorite or rotate” the ad says.

Quick question…Which color makes my ass look smaller?

And to “rotate” the colors?  Sorry Bed Bath & Beyond, I don’t need my privates lit up like a TSO concert.  I’m just trying to pee at 3am.

Just shaking my head all day.  If you have a SMH moment please share it with us in a comment.

Tll next time.

It took 2 people to write this crqp!

Time for some fun with multiple sclerosis!

Let’s take a TV show…and add a pinch of MS.

This bit was inspired by Margaret, a long-time My Odd Sock reader & fellow MSer.  She even contributed a few programs of her own!

Ready to play?

Join us as we “MS A TV Show”…..

Everybody Loves Rebif

Big Pharm’s Price is Right

Never thought Sarah J Parker was attractive.

Gonna Leave A Mark Tank

The Big Stem Cell Theory

A Rested Development

Gilligan’s Infusion  (A 3-hour tour)

On TV once a week (like the shot).

The Good Caregiver

Naked and Afraid To Call For Help

Band of Numbness

Lonesome Dive

A classic!

Cognitive Minds (A forgetful crime drama)

M*R*I

Curb Your Emotion

Blackish & Bluish

An MS soap opera.

Better Call Solumedrol

Bindfeld (Comedy about MS constipation)

Wide Awake @Midnight

Barbara Eden…a hottie!

American Puckers  (Swallowing a nasty Prednisone)

Monday Night Footdrop

and lastly, the space classic…..

…..Far Trek

Now THAT”S good television!  My DVR will soon be smoking from overuse!

Hope you enjoyed “MS A TV Show.”  Check your guide for program availability.

Dig in, literally.

Aww, what a cute little guy feeding himself.

Heavens, food on his hands.  His face.  Down his shirt!

That little dickens dropped mor eon the floor than he has on his plate!

Yeah, cute if you are three.  Not so much at 53.

Maybe I’m stretching the truth a tad…but not much.

Truth is, multiple sclerosis has stolen my ability to walk & run, but now, MS is taking dibs on my feeding skills!

Not that I was ever prim & proper in the dining room.  Today, my table etiquette would put Emily Post into convulsions.

No surgeon’s hands here!

I blame my hands mostly.

They just don’t work like they use to.

I fiddle-fart with a knife & fork to cut meat with the ferocity of a Grizzly.  Which explains my preference between a sandwich and a steak?  I’ll take a steak every time.  

Don’t get me wrong, I enjoy steak–I just struggle to cut it.  And I’m too embarrassed to ask for help.  In fact, if I can’t cut something with the edge of a fork–I don’t want it.  It’s just too difficult.

The time of day has a lot to do with my problem.

Four p.m. to seven p.m. is the weakest part of my day.  

And my hands show it.

Dainty I’m not.

A recent switch to using a fat-handled steak knife has helped.

But as you can see in the picture—there’s not much difference between me cutting a piece of chicken…and a WWE wrestler putting an opponent in a headlock!

Like a 12-round middle-weight bout.

Sometimes I feel like I am eating while wearing boxing gloves!

Can’t be any worse, I figure.

One “trick-of-the-trade” I use is to always request sitting at the kiddle table at functions.

There, I don’t look quite as messy…and I can blame my nephew for the sloppy place setting.

Eating like a three-year-old is all part of the game when one has MS.  How to deal with the frustrating difficulties is a matter of common sense & cooler heads.

Do you face the same problem?  How do you cope?

For now, I’ll enjoy my “finger-foods”—careful to stop at the finger.

Happy dining.

Read slowly!

Things are moving slowly these days.

Especially when you include my feet.

It feels as though I am moving through molasses.  Like the world is covered with the scratchy side of velcro–and my feet are soft & fuzzy.  (They truly ARE soft & fuzzy.)

Foot drop in both tootsies doesn’t help matters.

It just makes each perilous step that much slower & tentative.

I guess that is part of the deal when you have multiple sclerosis.

The sight matches the smell!

I’ve tried everything to pick up my speed in the past few weeks….changing my exercise routine, stretching more, even shoes!

Pictured here are my old-dog, well-worn “sliders.”

You know “sliders,” the shoes with the worn-down soles that glide easier over carpet & rough surfaces?

Every MSer has a certain go-to pair.

Well, not even “sliders” made a difference in my slow, plodding gait.

My super slo-mo foot speed made its point last week at my Mom’s house.

Shine bright, sorta.

She has a motion-activated light attached to the garage that lights the walk-way to the house.

I moved so slowly, I couldn’t even activate the motion sensor!

I had to wave my canes in the air to get the light to come on.

Tread lightly.

My brother said I was being “stealth.”

Like an elite force in the military.

I replied…”Yeah, I’m stealth—and you’re an ass!”

A recent doctors appointment recorded my 25ft walking speed at 25 seconds.  (Slower than my last visit)  Twenty-five seconds!

I cursed & huffed under my breath at the result.

They could have used a sundial for cryin out loud!

Winner by an antenna!

Yesterday morning I was getting the paper when I noticed this slug slithering across the ground.

I began to wonder if I could beat a slug in a race?

Cripes, beat again!

Being so slow there’s no way I could beat a sloth…..

Winner winner chicken dinner!

…Or Congress?

Oh hell no.  Let’s not get carried away–nothing moves that slow.

Even the slowest MSer moves faster than Congress!

I guess I’ll just keep trying.  Keep moving.  Keep plugging along.

Maybe the cooler temps of fall will bring me back.  Let’s hope so, as I can’t be the only one out there moving in super slo-mo.

P.S.  I have tried Ampyra to no avail.  Oh well.

Let see how this goes.

Who says MRI’s aren’t a good time?

You just gotta poke fun at the whole, crazy situation!

In this post, My Odd Sock shows you how to laugh in the face of the MRI.

So don’t move, while you enjoy “MRI Fun”…..

Seems true!

Higher rent though!

A 1 & a 2 & a 3…

Tips accepted.

A “breech” MRI.

Guys only.

Always prepared.

Head bangers agree.

Sistine contrast this!

Forceps please.

Please raise your drink tables.

When will it end?

Please share any of your own with a comment!

My Odd Sock Bonus-  These didn’t make the cut…

“A room with no view.”

“It’s like a dull Disney ride & costs about as much!”

“Does this count as a time share?”

You have been warned.

Welcome to “This & That.”

It’s the only uninspired name I could come up with to describe a blog post of disjointed, leftover ideas & pictures.

Shall we get started?…..

$600 a dose now!

With all the uproar these days in current events of a similiar product, I thought it was wise to demonstrate the proper use of an EpiPez.

Trusted all right.

Don’t you love businesses who make claims like this?

To me it says…”Beyond ’31—you’re on your own.”

Or…

“Screw you–you should be dead.”

(Geez Sock, don’t take things so literal!)

Say it like you mean it.

Here’s a recent front page of my local paper.

Yeah, just throw out the journalistic, news gathering and give me more coupons!

If only TV would be so bold to come out and say…”Now with more commercials!”

It’s my work car.

Saw this the other day.

Thought it would be cool to own this as a second car!

A fire truck would save time running errands because you never have to stop for the lights!

Great horn too!

Gee thanks.

Wee-haw!

So excited to get a new membership card in the mail.

Guess I have MS for another friggin year now.

Finally, who doesn’t love a little soft porn as I reveal my intimate summer tan lines…..

Hobbitt feet.

Below the ankle bone…Mee-ow!

Must have used SPF300 on those feet.

Those toosies haven’t seen the light of day since 1974.

I could grow mushrooms between the toes.

There, I warned you this would be a hodge-podge mess.

Hope you are happy.

Have a tremendous weekend.