The Cost of It All

The Cost of It All



I admit to being a tight-wad.

A miser.  Always looking for the value.

Mind you, I’m generous with others.  Quick to chip in.  But when it comes to buying something for myself?  I don’t.

Impulse buying is nil.  A dressy shirt?…Eh, I have plenty.  Cool shoes?…the ones I’m wearing are just fine.  And at a restaurant, I order a sandwich over a more expensive meal.


Meter is running!

Which is why I struggle every six months when it is time for my next Ocrevus infusion.

All I can think about is how my care provider charges the insurance company roughly $123,000 for that little brown bag of fluid.

One hundred and twenty-three thousand dollars.

That’s a whole lot of moo-lah!

You know what I could do with $123,000?

Why, I could…..


…have 41 colonoscopy procedures ($3,000 avg).

…buy 95 Taylor Swift concert tickets ($1,300 per).

…get hitched 4.7 times ($26,000 avg) (Like J-Lo).

…adopt 946 puppies ($130 per).

…get 683 carpet cleanings (bc of so many freakin puppies)

…enjoy 15,995 bags of York Peppermint Patties (my fav).

…buy 24,600 boxes of Girl Scout cookies.

…endure 1,892 workouts w/ personal trainer ($65/hr) because I eat too damn much.

…take 574 day ocean cruise ($214/day).

…get 316 laser hair removal treatments (hair growing in the wrong places).



Me, having fun with the calculator.



…buy 2,460 pickleball paddles.

…stay 82 days at mental hospital ($1,500/day) because of all the pickleball noise.

…hug 4,920 Build-A-Bears ($25/per) Better than a stay at the hospital.

…get 25 full-sleeve tattoos ($4,000 per) and tattoo removal ($1,000 per).

…buy 208,475 lbs of bananas (.59 lb) Will need help eating them before turning brown.

…build 11 greenhouses ($11,000 per) bc I love flowers.

…need 5,857 bottle of Zyrtec ($21 bottle)  Allergies.

…buy 1 Cadillac Escalade.

…get 3 fill-ups for Cadillac Escalade.

…pay 1,537 hours for a professional writer ($80/hr) to write more engaging content for this lame website.


The possibillities of how to spend $123,000 are endless.  And certainly more exciting than having a bag of fluid drain into my arm.  So what would you do with that much money?  

Till next time.  Spend wisely.



4 Replies to “The Cost of It All”

  1. All I have to say on the subject is thank goodness for Health Insurance !
    As to what I would do with $123,000.00, I don’t know because I don’t need anything.
    However, I live by something my father always told me “It’s only expensive if you can’t afford it”.
    I also want to mention I agree 100% with something you said in “The Joke Dumpster”. “Paid administrative leave” is NOT punishment–it’s VACATION!”. What’s up with that???

    1. Margaret,
      Like you, I don’t need anything either. I’m glad somebody reads the Joke Dumpster. Yeah that paid leave always bothers me. Seems nobody gets fired anymore. Thanks for your two cents!