High Performance Guy
I am not high performance, but apparently…I am.
Dri-Fit apparel has been around for years. If you aren’t familiar with the term, Dri-Fit is a polyester-type material used to make clothing by sports brands for “athletes and active lifestyles”…of which I am neither.
Yet digging through my shirt drawer, I happened to find two shirts bearing the Dri-Fit name.
They COULDN’T be mine.
Dri-Fit is supposed to be “high performance.”
No way I’m a high-performance guy.
I’m happy if I can make it to the bathroom without releasing my bladder.
Nothing about high performance. Just luck!
If I was high-performance, I’d have swagger. Wear a backwards ball-cap. Put goop in my hair.
High performance guys wear sunglasses when it’s dark. And tight pants. I hate tight pants!
They wear ear pods. I have ear wax.
High performance guys drive fancy cars. I drive a Honda Fit for crying out loud.
Nothing high performance about the Fit. It gets stuck going over a speed bump.
High performance guys watch all the cool shows on the popular streaming services. I watch “Seinfeld” on basic cable.
No, I am not in their clique.
Another big plus of Dri-Fit is that it helps the body cool itself. They call it “moisture-wicking” because it allows the sweat to move away from your skin to evaporate faster.
Again, not me.
I don’t do anything to form moisture. The most energetic activity I did today was make toast.
I am far from high-performance.
But as the old saying goes “possession is 9/10 of the law” so maybe, just maybe I AM a Dri-Fit high-performance guy. Now I’ll have to start talking like one…”Sup?“
4 Replies to “High Performance Guy”
😂 the only moisture wicking thing I wear is adult diapers!! 🤣
Tina,
Sorry to admit my shallowness, but your comment is freakin funny!!!!
I only have known about the term “wicking” for about 2 years. Priors to that, I had often wondered, why people, especially children, were wearing long sleeves to the beach and pool.
I too have been known to wear “wicking” diapers.
Margaret,
The folks in long sleeves at the pool may be wearing those new-fangled UV shirts that block the sun’s rays. Yep, just another amazing example of fabric technology. (I’ve barely moved past polyester!)