Frustration Station
“Thank you for riding MS Express, the fastest, most-direct route for disease progression.
Please remain seated till the train comes to a complete stop.
We welcome you to Frustration Station!”
You and I have been here before.
Many times, in fact.
Sometimes I get so frustrated having multiple sclerosis, I could spit rusty nails that have soaked in Draino.
After more than twenty-five years with this shit, one would think I accepted the truth and moved on with my new predicament.
But still (and often), I fight & cuss and throw a temper tantrum that would make a pre-schooler proud.
Just the other day my cane slipped, and I fell onto the basement floor.
In a quick rage I hulked out and wrapped the cane around a support beam.
(Yeah, I sure taught that cane a lesson! What a dumb ass I am.)
It hasn’t been the first time either. I’ve gone through enough canes over the years to arm a troop of tap dancers. I could have donated to “Gimps Without Sticks,” but instead I found it necessary to “teach that faulty aid a lesson.”
The frustrating part of MS is the inconsistency. It drives me crazy.
“I did this yesterday…so why can’t I do this today? Why such a struggle?”
There is seemingly no rhyme or reason to MS’s hit-n-miss attitude.
Plus, the identical task you couldn’t do today…you’ll do tomorrow with ease!
That’s WTF with a capital W-T-F!
I know this is trivial, but I get frustrated at times putting my wheelchair in the back of my car.
Some days I lift it and put it in–no problem.
Then, there are days when my balance is out of whack or my energy is depleted and a struggle ensues.
Of course, it would make much more sense & ease to lighten the chair by first removing the wheels—but my thick-skulled male ego won’t let me give in and admit defeat.
(Again, what a dumb ass I am.)
MS frustration doesn’t end there.
Maybe yours is opening a water bottle. Zipping a coat. Or pulling up pants without having to lean.
The possibilities are endless.
You and I (me especially) just need to recognize our limitations. Accept our situation. And calmy find heathy solutions to our daily dilemmas.
Simple as that to avoid an extended stay at Frustration Station.
“Alll aboard!!! Next stop Cog Fog, Muscle Tussle and Spastic Colon!”
Keep moving.
8 Replies to “Frustration Station”
I feel ya!! It is so freekin annoying when one day you can do something and the next day you can’t! Then you get some rest and you are able to do it again, it’s like you wake up and spin the imaginary MS handicap wheel and hope it lands on a good spot!
Tina,
Great idea with the MS handicap wheel. I’ll keep trying. Thanks for the boost!
Frustration Station is a perfect description! As are the various stops on the MS train. I don’t blame you my friend- I would have beaten the hell out of the cane too. Who the hell does that damn cane think it is? MS sure ain’t for the faint. Thank you for sharing this with us.
Yvonne,
Thanks for the support but I still feel silly about my over-the-top revenge on that cane. It must stem from my deep-down anger with MS–simple as that. Maybe we never fully accept our DX. Appreciate you checking in. Be well!
Doug, again you’ve hit this nail on the head again! My frustration level daily is through the roof! I feel all that you touched on. 42 years here. Some days I’m just DONE with it! But we keep going cuz we have too ❤️
Joanne,
Wow, 42 years…you are a trooper! Keep fighting girl. I believe at 50 you’re awarded a gold walking stick! Agree with your comment. Thanks for sharing!
I find when I have a “burst of energy”, I’m trying to get things done at warp speed, because I do not know what tomorrow will bring. It is so hard to explain to someone this symptom of MS. They can’t understand why you can’t do something today, if you did it yesterday.
When I was using a rollator, I found it easier to slide it in between the front and the back seat, because I became too weak, to lift it into the trunk.
Margaret,
Well said. And that’s a great idea with the rollator–thanks for sharing!
Go get’em today!