You Are Worth A Fortune

You Are Worth A Fortune

dollar sign

Multiple sclerosis may have squashed your self-image.

It may have slashed your self-worth.

But now my fellow MSer, you can hold your head high (If you are not too fatigued).

Because the New York Post has reported that rich people are hiring the disabled as “tour guides” at Walt Disney World!

Disney characters


Me?  A tour guide?

That’s right my gimpy friend.  YOU can be a personal “tour guide” for the rich at Disney World in Orlando, Florida!

You see, at Disney World, your shuffling, draggy feet allow you to zoom to the front of every line!

Up to six of your guests can also join you in skipping the lengthy lines of sweaty tourists.

And the rich are willing to pay you upwards of $130

per hour for your lack of mobility…

…That’s one-thousand & forty bucks for an eight-

hour day…

MRI brain lesions

…or, approximately $200 per

brain lesion!

Yes, never has being physically-challenged been so envied (and profitable) as it has become at Disney World.

Everyone fall in (not literally)!
Everyone fall in (not literally)!

Hmm, I could be a tour guide as I know firsthand from my many Disney experiences….Do the popular rides first thing in the morning.

Or, save Disney World for a mid-week visit as it gets very congested at the beginning & end of the week.

There you go rich folk.

I’ll even wear a diaper to reduce potty breaks!


Yep, screw you FastPass (Disney’s solution for expedience).

I’m disabled…and it’s my job to ensure these busy, one-percenters mustn’t wait to ride the Tea Cups!

My head is as big as the globe at Epcot.
My head is as big as the globe at Epcot.

So strap on your leg brace.

Charge the battery of your scooter.

And pump up the tires of your chair.

You are worth a fortune, my crippled com padre.

Bring me the lame, the hobbling and the impaired, as we soak the rich with our silenced bodies

Are you in?


7 Replies to “You Are Worth A Fortune”

  1. And in other Disney News…..the price of a ticket to Disney World goes up today to $95.00!!!

  2. This is the job for me…except for the heat in Florida! You thought of all the details here…with pics
    ps. My kids sure did like going to the front of the line with me, back in the day:)

  3. Thanks for letting me know! I can picture it now…and I’d bet we’d get to ride in golfcarts through the park too!

  4. Kim,
    I must agree. My family & friends also enjoyed the red carpet treatment during our trips to Disney. At first, I felt embarrassed moving past everyone in line, but in the Florida heat, the perk was welcome relief!

  5. Well, that sounds ………. ridiculous!!! LOL~~~ WE have a theme park here and even though I am plenty mobile I dread all the walking and people and heat. LOL I best keep on keepin on.
    🙂 Olivia