Can You Lend A Hand

Can You Lend A Hand


Opening Package

Is it me?

Is it my MS-riddled fumble fingers?

Or is it an evil conspiracy of product manufacturers that I can’t open a bag, carton, container, jar or can without using some tool resembling the “jaws of life.”


Try opening a package of Gillette Sensor razor blades?  My God, King Tut’s tomb opened easier!


Childproof?  More like idiotproof.
Childproof? More like idiotproof.


Certainly the difficulty all started with the medicine bottle.

But now, the frustration factor has been implemented by every other product producer under the guise of “ensuring freshness.”  Sure I feel good my ketchup has a titanium-strong foil lid covering the bottle.  But how the hell do I remove it to put some Heinz on my burger?



Open if you can.
Open if you can.


Deer Park Water proudly gloats on their bottles “Smaller Cap=Less Plastic.” 

Their “20% less plastic” may be better for the environment–or it could be a way for them to save 20% in cost.  For me, it means 20% less cap to grip while trying to open the bottle!



Scalpel.  Retractor.  Sponge.
Scalpel. Retractor. Sponge.


Opening the shrink-wrap packaging of a Finish Dish washing tablet must be like performing surgery.

I have never removed a spleen, but I believe I am now qualified after dissecting the shrink wrap off these or the wrap on a DVD box.




Go WITH the grain
Go WITH the grain


Cheese slices are another impossible item to open.

Looking for an edge to start, I dig & scratch with my fingernails like a flea-bitten junkyard dog!

It’s a shrink-wrapped package of shrink-wrapped cheese slices…Cracking the DNA code had less layers!




Use power tools with care.
Use power tools with care.


Opening the bag inside a box of cereal is challenging whether you have MS or not.  The bags seem to be spot-welded closed!

So secure, you would think the bags contained gold medalions instead of Golden Grahams!





Short of explosives, this is the best way to open condiment packets.
Short of explosives, this is the best way to open condiment packets.


Finally, ketchup packets are in a league of their own.

They won’t tear, won’t squeeze, won’t twist.

I swear if I ever jump from a tall building, I want to land on a giant packet of ketchup, because I can be assured it will never, ever open.  (And if it did—the accident scene would look gruesome, wouldn’t it?)



Share with me your opening woes as when it comes to opening a package, we could all use a helping hand.


4 Replies to “Can You Lend A Hand”

  1. I use my teeth alot. Any dentist would have a fit. I can no longer worry about ruining my teeth if it does the trick. My friend with arthritis has broken 2 teeth. Luckily, my teeth are all intact. I keep scissors all over my house to cut those “pull apart bags”. I request easy open caps for my mail order medications. However, there is one I take that comes in the drug company bottles. It is impossible for even an able-bodied person to open. My sister had to take the medicine bottle down to CVS and the nice pharmacist had some type of gadget, opened the bottle, and provided me with an easy open cap. And I agree with you on those 20% less cap to grip water bottles. I have someone “pop the seal”, and put the cap back on before putting them in the fridge. I end up drinking the whole bottle of water because I can’t replace the cap. I have experienced every thing you mentioned. Don’t get me started on dropping the item, before I even try to open it………….

  2. Hi, I love your article. This is a great site and I wanted to post a note to let you know, good job!

  3. For water or soda bottles I twist an extra-wide rubber band (comes on produce or sometimes mail) around the cap – gives a better grip and reduces frustration! Also usually works for jar lids.

  4. Couldn’t agree more and MS is making it worse. My drug company thought so too and sent me this pretty blue thing-a-ma-jig to help. The only problem is that with my cognition issues I can’t figure out how it works!!