Inside The Tube

Inside The Tube


MRIPardon the pun, but here’s something you can take laying down—-having multiple sclerosis means you’ll be spending considerable time undergoing MRI examinations.


Heck, I’ve had so many MRI’s, I count by using the fingers on both hands and the toes on my left foot.  (I haven’t been able to use my right foot since that incident on the alligator farm!)


I remember the fear of my innaugural plunge into the belly of an MRI machine.  It evoked claustrophobic flashbacks of my childhood when my older brother would smother me by stuffing me headfirst into a zipped sleeping bag.


Comparison test
Comparison test


Speaking of head—how was my melon-head going to fit through that little opening?

I’m the only person EVER to get their dome stuck in an MRI gizmo.

Finally, the techs had to grease my ears like the wheel bearings on a Chevy Impala and push me in.



Once inside the MRI though, my fears quickly disappeared when I realized it wasn’t as bad as I had thought.  The tunnel was close, sure…but it was well-lit and a comfortable breeze was blowing.

Now, I had 90 minutes to kill while the “click & clack” of the machine did its business.


Some folks sleep during an MRI, while others enjoy listening to music.

Me?  I start by leaving my mark with graffiti.

Some of my inspired scribings include…”For a good time, call Dr. so & so.”  (You can insert your own doctor’s name here!)

Or, “If you can read this, you’re too close!”  (Wait, this is an MRI–you are DEFINATELY too close!)

Maybe some poetry…”Here I lay, perfectly still.  Have an itch, it takes strong will.”



I also like to think of ideas to make the MRI experience a bit more pleasurable.  Here are a few examples…


Video Screen  Hey, if I can listen to music, why not watch a movie?


magic fingers


Magic Fingers Massage  An MRI can be uncomfortable.  Imagine the soothing comfort of a Magic Fingers massage on your back!




Pedicure w/ optional Corn/Bunions treatment  This would put the “Mmmm” in MRI!



tanning bed


Finally, Combination MRI/Tanning Bed  Get a brain scan AND a deep, rich tan at the same time!



I’m sure you have some interesting ways to kill time inside the tube.  Please share them in a comment so we can all enjoy our future MRI’s with gusto!

Stay still…and we’ll see you when you come out.






3 Replies to “Inside The Tube”

  1. I would like to start by saying THANK YOU to you, for having such a great web site. Your acticles deal with every day situations we all deal with, but with a sense of humour.

    I’ve had MS going on 26 years, and have had too many MRI’s to count. I’m a sleepper, I fall asleep, until the voice from nowhere tells me to “lie still sir”. Only problem with that is, my right leg twitches when ever it wants to, and the more I try to control it, the more it twitches. “We can put a pillow underneath your leg if you would like?” Like that’s going to do any good. I feel like telling them, “why dont you just nail my leg to the table, I probably wouldn’t feel it anyway”. “OH, that would require more paperwork sir”.

    I had one extensive MRI for a study about iron presence on the brain. Upon completion of the scan I asked the doctor if they found a brain during the procedure, and if so, could he send a statement to my wife that he did find a brain inside my head. He said he could verify that a brain was present, but could not verify the functionality.

  2. Sometimes I try to visualize natives dancing to the “drum beat” of the MRI sounds. Other times I sing Broadway show tunes in my head. I go thru whatever songs I know in a musical,then go to the next show. It’s okay if you don’t the words. The worst MRI is with and without contast. You feel like you have to do the same thing twice.

  3. I used to write for a site like yours, for some reason I stopped doing it.. Definitely keep it up, you’re a great webmaster..