Brain Drain #20

Brain Drain #20




Brain Drain


It’s hot.

I’m cranky.

Let’s “Brain Drain.”


Hold on.  Hold it fella.  Before you get started, don’t you think it may be wise to tell those unfamiliar with “Brain Drain” about the concept?


“Brain Drain” is very simple.  It’s my way of spouting off about dumb things happening around us.  (I didn’t say it was deeply thought provoking.  Consider the author.)



Here we go…….



It’s Crazy Alright.


Vonage logoI believe you are familiar with Vonage, the upstart phone network.

Vonage has been around for years now……just long enough to create a marketing campaign to strangle the life out of any market share they have.


Maybe you have seen their new representative…….


Vonage guy


Yeah, it’s the Vonage “Crazy Generous Guy.”

While some companies go out of their way to hire returning war veterans, Vonage decided to hire the homeless.

Vonage is “crazy generous” alright.  I’d say they are just plain “crazy!”


We now take you inside a Vonage corporate marketing strategy meeting……


V.P.- We need a new company face.  Someone disheveled!

#1- How ’bout the “Unabomber” Ted Kaczynski?

V.P.- No no, he’s in jail.

#2- What about Ted Williams, the golden-voiced homeless guy?

V.P.- Nah, he’s too mainstream.

#3- Why don’t we go down to the plasma center and have a casting call?

V.P.- …The one on MLK?  Great call!


Vonage #2


Seriously.

Wouldn’t you want someone with a bit more credibility…than some guy in need of a hot & a cot?

Where’s Laura Prudent when we need her.






Moving onward…..




Drink Up


Coors Light can


All I can say is thank you to the fine engineers at the Coors Brewing Company.


Just when I thought downing a brewski involved popping the top and pouring it down my gullet, Coors took boozing to a higher calling.





coors canIntroducing “The World’s Most Refreshing Can.”

You see, not only does Coors have the “Frost Brew Liner” and the “Cold Activated Mountains.”

But they also have the “Two Stage Cold Indicator.”  As well as a “Double Vented Wide Mouth.”


Gee, I didn’t know I would need an engineering degree to swill a beer!


The “Two-Stage Cold Indicator” is a Godsend as I was having trouble deciding if my beer was cold enough.

And kuddos for the “Double Vented Wide Mouth.”  Now I can exceed the legal blood-alcohol limit in seconds flat.

Thankfully Coors put all their technological advances into the CAN…and kept the crappy beer just the same!

Good job Adolph Herman Joseph Coors!



And finally…..



IMG_1155



Considered “armed &

dangerous” in the Sunshine

state.





Short & sweet.  That does it for “Brain Drain #20.”

Want to get something off your chest?  Feel free to spill it in a comment.

You’ll feel better for it.

sock









5 Replies to “Brain Drain #20”

  1. Haha – Coors Light was what we drank in college…when we were flush w/ cash. Otherwise, it was Natural Light. In either case, eww. Just eww. But I bet that wide-mouth can would’ve been a big hit back then. Especially when one of the drinking games we played regularly involved people shouting, “CHUG, mother******, CHUG, mother*****, CHUG!!!!” Ahhh, the good old days.

  2. Ms. Cranky,

    I figured you for an Ivy Leaguer! Thanks for ruining the image.

    Karen,

    For some reason, my computer didn’t de-script your last word. What is “pony pi(*”

Making it official.