Bladder’s Worst Enemies

 

 

The bladder.  Not what’s inside a football, but what’s inside your belly.

The keeper of the urine.  Your purse of pee.

If you have multiple sclerosis odds are you have issues with this often leaky organ.

 

 

From sneaky dribbles to full-on opening of the flood gates, there’s not much you can do about it. 

I’ve tried kegels…oh yeah, my pelvic floor is strong enough to lift an air fryer.  And you can’t limit your fluid intake as you gotta stay hydrated.

It’s a fine line we walk (slowly) each day.

In my experience I’ve come up with seven of a bladder’s worst enemies…

 

#7 Dry Mouth/Baclofen

Many prescription drugs make you as dry as a tumbleweed.

I take Baclofen three times a day for spasticity and soon after popping a pill I’m spitting cotton balls.

My tongue feels like a pudding skin left in the sun.

So you must keep drinking…and that means more potty trips.

 

#6  Stairs

I am still able to climb stairs (sometimes crawl).

But while going up or going down stairs is when the urge to pee hits me like a prizefighter.

Most times, I’m usually in the middle of the flight and must decide which way (up or down) is the closest & fastest way to the head.

 

#5  Buttons & Zippers

 

When you gotta go, time is of the essence.

Being fast is key so buttons and zippers on a pair of pants act like speedbumps to the whole urinary process.

Making it worse is my terrible sense of balance.

I’m forced to lean against something, ANYTHING to undo my pants in time.

 

#4  Belts 

I like wearing belts.

They make you look snazzy.  All dapper.

But when speed is a factor of the go, a belt is just another thing you must do to quickly drop your drawers.

Sorry belts, at this stage in my MS life, it’s function over fashion.

 

#3  Drawstrings 

If you wear athletic shorts, sweat pants, even some pj’s then you know the trouble with drawstrings.

Most times they come untied without a hitch.

But it’s when your bladder’s about to burst that it knots so tight you need a Boy Scout troop to undo them.

 

#2  Toilet Bath Mats

Oh sure, they look so swell around a john!

But if you have MS fumble-feet like me, I end up tripping & kicking that shit all over the room during my final approach to planting my backside on a toilet seat.

I really, really hate them!

 

And finally, the number one worst enemy of a bladder…..

#1  TheToilet Lid

Hard to believe a toilet lid would be such a big deal.

But when the lid is down…it’s that tiny, little ever-so-slight stoop you must do to lift a lid that’s all the difference between success…and a splash-zone disaster.

To summarize:  Lid up-GOOD.  Lid down-BAD.

Can you think of any other enemies of your bladder?  Please share!

I’ve kept you too much too long so till next time, happy going.