Store Wars

Wed, Dec 9, 2015

Humor

 

Coming December 18th, 2015 to a multiplex theater near you
is a long-awaited movie materpiece that has fans bursting  with anticipation.

“Sisters” stars television icons Tina Fey and Amy Poehler in a comedy of weekend hijinks.

But this isn’t about THAT movie.

It’s about “Star Wars: The Force Awakens.”

and the hype surrounding the release of Episode VII.

 

Yep, can you believe it?  Star Wars is everywhere right now.

The only thing that could top the publicity hoopla of this film would be if Kim Kardashian & Kanye West starred in a new Harry Potter!

Of course product endorsements for Star Wars are off the chart.

Here at My Odd Sock, I’d like to share with you the wide range of commercialized ridiculousness…

 

A big bowl like would you?

A big bowl like would you?

 

Our first stop is the grocery store where the force can be found in nearly every aisle.

 

Here, Yoda starts his day with a big bowl of his own line of Lucky Charms.

No wonder he flies all around so quick—he’s buzzing on a sugar-high!

 

 

Dee-Lish!

Dee-Lish!

 

 

 

Yoda snacks on his Cheez-Its as well.

(And who doesn’t?)

 

 

Awesome crunch!

Awesome crunch!

 

 

 

 

 

We have Tie Fighters made of Cinnamon Toast Crunch.

Let’s hope the wings don’t get soggy from the milk!

 

 

Aaaaaa, I'll pass.

Aaaaaa, I’ll pass.

 

 

Finally, in the dairy, we find Star Wars Go-Gurt.

 

Is it just me or do you think it would be kind of gross to swallow some of Chewbacca’s Go-Gurt?

 

 

 

Have a seat.

Have a seat.

 

 

In the stores, you’ll find plenty of Star Wars products you don’t need.

 

Like a Star Wars Saucer Chair.

With my big butt, I’d probably smother Yoda!

“Shift so I can breathe, you will?”

 

 

Snuggle up Storm Trooper.

Snuggle up Storm Trooper.

 

 

We have Star Wars pillows.

 

I can’t picture Darth Vader as a cuddler.

 

 

 

Breathe easy.

Breathe easy.

 

 

 

This is really odd.

An R2D2 or Darth Vader humidifier.

 

(Guess that explains Darth’s heavy breathing.)

 

 

 

That is one ugly dog.

That is one ugly dog.

 

 

 

Star Wars pet supplies?

Oh for God sakes, really?

 

Sure, let’s put a fur coat over the fur coat of an animal.  Know wonder this dog is ready to nip.

 

 

All Jedi's started this way.

All Jedi’s started this way.

 

 

 

Here is a Star Wars kickboxing trainer.

 

Have you ever seen a Jedi fighting in the Octagon?  Didn’t think so.

 

I’ll stick with a light saber if you don’t mind.

 

 

Where's the sharpener?

Where’s the sharpener?

 

 

And in the future of technology, in a galaxy far far away…do you think they really use crayons?

 

Maybe in the future, they will figure out what the hell color Magenta really is!

 

 

Scrub-A-Dub!

Scrub-A-Dub!

 

 

Finally, how aboout a Star Wars showerhead?

 

R2D2 is fixed to the wall, but Darth Vader is handheld.

 

I’ll bet he would be thrilled to know I’m shoving his face in weird places to wash my dark side!

 

 

 

There you have it.  The complete Store Wars Star Wars collection of crap you don’t need.

Enjoy the flick when you see it.  And may the farce be with you.

 

 

In the mood for more Star Wars fun?  Check out Yvonne DeSousa’s latest blog post at yvonnedesousa.com

 

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