My Odd Sock

My sincere apology but the Thanksgiving turkey’s triptophan is still kicking around in my big, empty head.  So here is another “twice is nice” post.

Recently I was approved for Social Security Disability.

Good or bad, being labeled a “gimp” by your Federal Government elicits a mixed bag of emotions on your psyche.

Family & friends have been very supportive during the whole process and many offered words of encouragement..even extending heartfelt congratulations upon my approval (that in itself was a little strange–in an odd sort of way).

I wondered if I would receive any cards of congrats. (I didn’t)  I wondered if greeting card companies even make such a card? (They don’t)  So I thought I would give it a try to come up with a few greeting card slogans of my own….

“Your bladder dribbles.  Your legs are tight.  And now Social Security is looking bright.”

                                                              *****

“Your feet may scuff & shuffle, but your disability is no truffle.”

                                                              *****

“Don’t lose your balance—Congrats you’re approved!”

                                                               *****

“We hear there’s good news to share…like wearing spandex and thong underwear.”

                                                                *****

“You already get the best parking spaces.  Check the mail & you’re off to the races.”

                                                                 *****

“The myelin sheath is full of holes…and now you’re on the public dole.”

                                                                  *****

“Once a month you’ll get your dough…soon you’ll be on the Maury Povich Show!”

                                                                 *****

“We have a check with your name on it…that puts to an end this welfare sonnet.”

                                                                  *****

Now you can see why I was rejected by American Greetings!